oh canada..
Jan. 8th, 2006 09:44 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
transomwhiplassI saw Brokeback Mountain last night. Not only was it one of the most tragic stories I've ever heard in my life, but it reinforced my extreme desire to go to Canada. The movie was filmed in Alberta and the nature cuts (which are abundant to a "National Geographic" documentary point) were entirely breathtaking.
I'm mildly amused at how a bit of joking American-escapsim turned into an actual desire for me. It's not a joke at all anymore and it's something that I know I actually want to do. I really want to tour Canada sometime and not too distant in the future. The scenery, the music, nice people, big cities, 19 year drinking age (LOL), there's really a million reasons floating around in my head. I've decided this is going to happen. It's really not often that I feel this sincere completely personal desire to do something so this needs to be embraced as soon as possible.
This last week has been one existential crisis after another. With too much time on my hands, I've stumbled into the age old college mind trap by pondering postmodernity a little too hard. Excuse my crudeness, but it's a quagmire and it sucks balls. Dwelling on personal feelings had me in a real (un)emotinal tisy and caused a freak out. I felt like I couldn't tap into myself at all, in attempts to reverse it I painted my nails black to force the emo out.
It didn't work. However! Getting out and seeing people, getting THREE nights of appropriately scheduled and lengthed sleep hours has me feeling unusually chipper this morning. Now.. if I only had something to do today. We were supposed to have an exec retreat at our house today but I don't know whether it's going to happen or not. If anything, around noonish I'll wander down to the bookstore to pickup a few things I need for the first day of classes (a few architecture supplies). I'm going to wait on books to see what I can buy off Rachel and see which class I decide to drop. My worry is that I will have some kind of overachiever/indecision streak and decide not to drop either - this would lead to absolute self-destruction later in the term. Anyway..
That felt coherent. Exciting. I'm going to go get lost for a few hours.
I'm mildly amused at how a bit of joking American-escapsim turned into an actual desire for me. It's not a joke at all anymore and it's something that I know I actually want to do. I really want to tour Canada sometime and not too distant in the future. The scenery, the music, nice people, big cities, 19 year drinking age (LOL), there's really a million reasons floating around in my head. I've decided this is going to happen. It's really not often that I feel this sincere completely personal desire to do something so this needs to be embraced as soon as possible.
This last week has been one existential crisis after another. With too much time on my hands, I've stumbled into the age old college mind trap by pondering postmodernity a little too hard. Excuse my crudeness, but it's a quagmire and it sucks balls. Dwelling on personal feelings had me in a real (un)emotinal tisy and caused a freak out. I felt like I couldn't tap into myself at all, in attempts to reverse it I painted my nails black to force the emo out.
It didn't work. However! Getting out and seeing people, getting THREE nights of appropriately scheduled and lengthed sleep hours has me feeling unusually chipper this morning. Now.. if I only had something to do today. We were supposed to have an exec retreat at our house today but I don't know whether it's going to happen or not. If anything, around noonish I'll wander down to the bookstore to pickup a few things I need for the first day of classes (a few architecture supplies). I'm going to wait on books to see what I can buy off Rachel and see which class I decide to drop. My worry is that I will have some kind of overachiever/indecision streak and decide not to drop either - this would lead to absolute self-destruction later in the term. Anyway..
That felt coherent. Exciting. I'm going to go get lost for a few hours.
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Date: 2006-01-09 05:37 am (UTC)