SUUUUUUUUCK!
Dec. 17th, 2002 08:24 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
transomwhiplassMy finals weren't that bad today.. I forgot how to do one type of physics problem, at least I thought I did and there were 2 questions like that. There was also this HORRIBLE velocity, acceleration, "catch-up" problem.. I EVEN WROTE HOW TO DO NORMAL ONES ON MY SHEET!! GAHH!.. Ok.. so I missed at least 3, I need like, a 60-something for an A.. and a -60-something to fail.. HAHAHA! Morality was err.. most questions were "duhhhhhhh!" but some I never had seen before, the same thing goes. I didn't check my scantron, instead I rewrote my esaay in a more literate/legible fashion.
---
After finals, my mom announced, she "wanted me to meet her friend." She knows some people at a small design (?) firm.. all I know, they had what seemed like 2 really cool art people and a shroud of inanely boring, frightening ones. I met the "boss," my mom told me she wanted me to intern there over Christmas (weeks back while she was talking about her work - I tune out) anyhow.. IT TURNS INTO A JOB INTERVIEW.. the guy asked to look at my website and basically traumatized me. It looks bad right now and I've been working on a new layout. I WAS HORRIFIED. I made the MISTAKE of showing him my forums.. I never realized how bright I have my screen, everything is legible to me.. it looked sooooo dark on his. "This won't do, you can't read this; this isn't legible." Look.. I was flushed the whole hour we were there, blood rushed from brain to face.. I was terrified, my throat burned, I felt like crying, I'm such a wimp.. but I was so scared and unprepared. I then had to meet the office, the coding lady who was impressed that I didn't rely on Frontpage. Some other dude using a computer language I don't know. It was scary. Then I talked to the design guy, and he was incredibly spiffy! He worked on a lot of animation movies: chicken run, space jam, some other stuff. He was drawing characters on a light board and this cool other young guy was doing something to it on illustrator. He was really nice and he said that he really liked my work. I don't know if that was genuine. I tried to make it clear that: I taught myself pretty much everything, it was all trial and error, this site had only existed since August, I had been in school, I'm playing around with it, I want to learn, I make progress when I can, oh.. and I'm 16. Nevertheless, I'm traumatized: right after finals: uniform & disheveled appearance, old layout, no preparation for rapid fire thinking questions. God... if you could have only heard, "oh.. a blog site" it just made me feel really un-special, I know it isn't, there are a million like it. If I had the time, and the ideas, and the talent.. it would be a lot more. I've only been in this whole design thing for less than a year. He should give me credit. I came home, slept, woke for a "good dinner," cried because it wasn't.. I was really tired and I got yelled at....
Life sucks so much... I don't know if I want to pursue this career option if I'm working for critical mean people.. but I guess thats how everything is. Coding lady said his "illegible" thing was his sense of humor, and I would need to pick up on that. All I know, is that the way he looked at me and the tone in his voice said, "this is unacceptable and there is no reason for this to be as bad as it is." I told him about Ms. Smith, he thinks she's a hack and that background images and times new roman are "so early 90's," but hey, I used "bourgeois" in a sentence. CORRECTLY. That should count for something in my book.
I'm ok with my PSAT (or as I enjoy calling it, Puh-Sat) scores.. especially since I thought I bombed it. My brain freaked out during the test and screwed me over on the blatantly obvious. I skipped questions wisely though. Anyhow, taking the cheap class and a year of extra high school I got a 1260, better than my 1150 sophomore year.. when I wasn't taking it seriously. All in all, I could've and should've tried harder, and probably have eaten breakfast, and had 8 hours+ of sleep, and just prepared myself. But, whatever, I thought I bombed. it.. but top 8% is not bad. My selection index is like... 21 points off of the commended kids..... haaaaaaaaaaa... so yeah.... guess I won't be national merit but screw that.
I need to study for Latin and Pre-Cal, the rest of this week will be death.
---
After finals, my mom announced, she "wanted me to meet her friend." She knows some people at a small design (?) firm.. all I know, they had what seemed like 2 really cool art people and a shroud of inanely boring, frightening ones. I met the "boss," my mom told me she wanted me to intern there over Christmas (weeks back while she was talking about her work - I tune out) anyhow.. IT TURNS INTO A JOB INTERVIEW.. the guy asked to look at my website and basically traumatized me. It looks bad right now and I've been working on a new layout. I WAS HORRIFIED. I made the MISTAKE of showing him my forums.. I never realized how bright I have my screen, everything is legible to me.. it looked sooooo dark on his. "This won't do, you can't read this; this isn't legible." Look.. I was flushed the whole hour we were there, blood rushed from brain to face.. I was terrified, my throat burned, I felt like crying, I'm such a wimp.. but I was so scared and unprepared. I then had to meet the office, the coding lady who was impressed that I didn't rely on Frontpage. Some other dude using a computer language I don't know. It was scary. Then I talked to the design guy, and he was incredibly spiffy! He worked on a lot of animation movies: chicken run, space jam, some other stuff. He was drawing characters on a light board and this cool other young guy was doing something to it on illustrator. He was really nice and he said that he really liked my work. I don't know if that was genuine. I tried to make it clear that: I taught myself pretty much everything, it was all trial and error, this site had only existed since August, I had been in school, I'm playing around with it, I want to learn, I make progress when I can, oh.. and I'm 16. Nevertheless, I'm traumatized: right after finals: uniform & disheveled appearance, old layout, no preparation for rapid fire thinking questions. God... if you could have only heard, "oh.. a blog site" it just made me feel really un-special, I know it isn't, there are a million like it. If I had the time, and the ideas, and the talent.. it would be a lot more. I've only been in this whole design thing for less than a year. He should give me credit. I came home, slept, woke for a "good dinner," cried because it wasn't.. I was really tired and I got yelled at....
Life sucks so much... I don't know if I want to pursue this career option if I'm working for critical mean people.. but I guess thats how everything is. Coding lady said his "illegible" thing was his sense of humor, and I would need to pick up on that. All I know, is that the way he looked at me and the tone in his voice said, "this is unacceptable and there is no reason for this to be as bad as it is." I told him about Ms. Smith, he thinks she's a hack and that background images and times new roman are "so early 90's," but hey, I used "bourgeois" in a sentence. CORRECTLY. That should count for something in my book.
I'm ok with my PSAT (or as I enjoy calling it, Puh-Sat) scores.. especially since I thought I bombed it. My brain freaked out during the test and screwed me over on the blatantly obvious. I skipped questions wisely though. Anyhow, taking the cheap class and a year of extra high school I got a 1260, better than my 1150 sophomore year.. when I wasn't taking it seriously. All in all, I could've and should've tried harder, and probably have eaten breakfast, and had 8 hours+ of sleep, and just prepared myself. But, whatever, I thought I bombed. it.. but top 8% is not bad. My selection index is like... 21 points off of the commended kids..... haaaaaaaaaaa... so yeah.... guess I won't be national merit but screw that.
I need to study for Latin and Pre-Cal, the rest of this week will be death.
